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From: jss@sjuvax.UUCP (J. Shapiro)
Newsgroups: net.singles,net.social
Subject: Re: Living in sin?
Message-ID: <815@sjuvax.UUCP>
Date: Wed, 6-Feb-85 22:00:15 EST
Article-I.D.: sjuvax.815
Posted: Wed Feb  6 22:00:15 1985
Date-Received: Fri, 8-Feb-85 03:28:13 EST
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Organization: Saint Josephs Univ. Phila., Pa.
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Xref: watmath net.singles:5799 net.social:453

[Aren't you hungry...?]

> Look at things-- back then, men cheated on their wives, lied to them,
> beat them (and their children), and were generally nasty.
> 
> 
> You haven't been through either marriage or divorce, Greg. You miss a
> perspective on the situation. What you say may sound good to you, but to
> someone who's been through the whole shebang, you are saying things in a
> very naive and simplitic form that isn't really correct. I'd suggest being
> very careful with how you say things in the future, or stick to things you
> have a better knowledge of.
> 
> chuq

Number one, things (as Chuq pointed out) haven't changed all that much.
Rape, wife beating, child beating, and all sorts of things have risen
dramatically in the past 10-20 years.  Tragic, yes, but so. 

Though Greg hasn't been through marriage (nor have I), his comments are
valuable to some of us because even when they show lack of perspective:

	1. He learns from them because people like chuq answer him (and me)

	2. We all learn from them because we evaluate them, and for some of us
	   we find that we see things in a new light built on awareness
	   of someone else's being right OR wrong.

I won't agree with keeping Greg quiet.  I think the letters about Jeff
Sargeant make the problems with that all too clear.  I will agree that
Greg's comments might have been phrased better and better thought through.
The grave difficulty with the topic of marriage/divorce/living together
is that it is all too easy to step on peoples toes without realizing it,
and though I don't know from personal experience, a suspect it *HURTS* when
your toes get stepped on ona topic like that.

On the other hand, Chuq and others need to remember that reading this stuff
is reading the opinions of people who may not agree with him or have his
perspective.  The consideration needs to go both ways, even when it's hard.

Personally, it sounded like Chuq had a lousy day...

Jon Shapiro
Haverford College