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From: joe@fluke.UUCP (Joe Kelsey)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: The Clean Song
Message-ID: <1769@vax4.fluke.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 3-Aug-84 11:30:33 EDT
Article-I.D.: vax4.1769
Posted: Fri Aug  3 11:30:33 1984
Date-Received: Sun, 12-Aug-84 01:58:31 EDT
Organization: John Fluke Mfg. Co., Everett, WA
Lines: 40

This is from Oscar Brandt's record "Bawdy Sea Chanty's."  It works best
if you puase in your reading where I have included the "-"s so that you
can let your imagination work out a better ending for the phrase.

There once was a Sailor who looked through a glass
And spied a fair mermaid with scales on her - island
Where seagulls flew over their nest.
She combed the long hair which hung over her - shoulders
And caused her to tickle and itch.
The sailor cried out "There's a beautiful - mermaid.
A sittin' out there on the rocks."
The crew came a running
All grabbing their - glasses
And crowded four deep to the rail.
All eager to share in this fine piece of - news
Which the captain soon heard from the watch.
He tied down the helm and reached for his - crackers
And cheese which he kept near the door
In case he might someday encounter a - mermaid
He knew he must use all his wits.
"Throw out a line and we'll lasso her - flippers.
And soon we will certainly find
If mermaids are better before or be - brave
My dear fellows," The captain cried out.
So heading to starboard they tacked with dispatch
A caught that fair mermaid right under her - elbows
And hustled her down below decks.
All took a turn at her - feminine
Setting her free at the end of the farce.
She splashed in the water landing flat on her - After
A while one man noticed some scabs.
Soon they broke out with the pox and the - scratching
And cursing with spleen.
This song may be dull, but it's certainly clean.

There are many other wonderfully bawdy songs on that album and others
by Oscar Brandt, most of which can still be found at record stores
specializing in large collections.  I may post sone of the other songs
(probably rotated) if I get inspired.

/Joe