Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 8/1/84; site rlgvax.UUCP Path: utzoo!linus!decvax!mcnc!philabs!cmcl2!seismo!rlgvax!oz From: oz@rlgvax.UUCP (THE GREAT AND POWERFUL OZ) Newsgroups: net.jokes Subject: A groaner (it's been too long) Message-ID: <44@rlgvax.UUCP> Date: Thu, 9-Aug-84 19:16:45 EDT Article-I.D.: rlgvax.44 Posted: Thu Aug 9 19:16:45 1984 Date-Received: Tue, 14-Aug-84 06:47:25 EDT Distribution: net Organization: CCI, Federal Sales Office Lines: 39 In England they refer to their Unions as "Guilds" (an oversimplification but necessary as you shall soon see), which is the basis of this story. If you were to go to Harley Street in London and go to the basement office of the Guild of Radio Scriptwriters you would be disgusted (as is everyone) by the terrible color (sorry, colour) of the walls (sort of a tan, brown thing) and the strange scent of spoiled milk that is all over their offices. People wonder why this is the case, and I shall tell you. Many years ago there was no Guild for the Radio Scriptwriters and they were taken advantage of in the industry. The Radio Scriptwriters banded together and refused to submit any more scripts until the BBC would recognize their guild. It was a hard time for all concerned but finally the BBC gave in and the guild won. The writers got more pay, more control of their work and better working conditions. Being very excited about their guild they decided to open an office and chose the site on Harley Street. Unfortunately, they didn't have any money to set up the office so they asked all members to help with the decorating. Some dona- ted furniture, others helped clean, but there was no money available for painting the walls. Well, England still has somewhat of a barter economy. One of the writers was working on a farm show and was paid in a brown sludge that was used as fertilizer. Another writer worked for a dairy farm and was paid with 20 gallons of raw milk. The milk sat around in his flat for about 2 weeks while he tried to figure out what to do with it. During this time two things happened; the milk started to turn, and the writer worked on a science program. On the science program he discovered that if he mixed the brown sludge, the milk and some lacquer, it would make a primitive form of paint. They did this and came up with the colour I described earlier. They painted their offices and were very pleased to finally have a "professional" office. Thus other Guilds can have their fancy offices and decorator walls, but the Radio screenwriters are happy to be the "Guild with the Curdled Beige". This from "My Word", on you local PBS radio station. OZ seismo!rlgvax!oz