Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site nsc.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!floyd!harpo!seismo!hao!hplabs!menlo70!nsc!chuqui From: chuqui@nsc.UUCP (Chuq Von Rospach) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: getting over it... - (nf) Message-ID: <669@nsc.UUCP> Date: Sat, 18-Feb-84 15:31:41 EST Article-I.D.: nsc.669 Posted: Sat Feb 18 15:31:41 1984 Date-Received: Sun, 19-Feb-84 08:17:35 EST References: <1379@pur-ee.UUCP>, <1651@utcsstat.UUCP>, <915@proper.UUCP> <3482@utzoo.UUCP>, <525@orca.UUCP> Organization: National Semiconductor, Sunnyvale Lines: 44 Richard (micomvax!softech) say: At first, I had thought that Laura was an alien of some sort from a far away planet with only rocks and dead fish. But now I realize that she is indeed a human being, one that has completely shunted herself from sensitivity and compassion, and from love. Her neat, almost flawless logic, her inability to accept feelings remind me of an empty fortress... So many walls, but to protect what? Those among us who have lost someone we loved deeply know what pain we are talking about. It is unnecessary to elaborate on it among ourselves, and pointless to try to explain it to someone who hasn't been there. So please save us the 200-line rhetoric, will ya? Richard, I think you didn't read the article carefully enough. I know that I didn't the first time through. You are making some very basic assumptions about Laura that simply aren't true. As someone who has conversed with her on and off at length on a number of subjects, I know that laura has not shunted away any of her feelings. You seem to be making the assumption that emotions and logic are mutually imcompatible, and are comdemming her for allowing logic and emotion to mix. Logic and emotions should be partners, assisting each other in making the most of life. Laura's point was that people who allow themselves to dwell in emotions (in this case harmful ones, but the point works across the board) to the exclusion of the fact that logically this makes no sense (I know I heart, so why I am I not doing something to minimize that hurt?) are really doing themselves no favors. It's a lot easier to ignore the logic when you hurt. If you play yourself as a martyr long enough, someone will attempt to make you feel better. But while you wait for that saviour, all you are doing is making yourself miserable (and usually those around you as well). If you don't wait, and you try to follow that logical part of you out of the wilderness, it isn't going to stop hurting right away, but the hurt will be less, and will stop sooner. You may even find that you no longer need someone to prop you up when you're down, which should be the goal of every person who wants to be truly happy. chuq -- From the house at Pooh Corner: Chuq 'Nuke Wobegon' Von Rospach {fortune,menlo70}!nsc!chuqui Have you hugged your Pooh today? It's showtime, folks!